I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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