I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
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