he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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