I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
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