I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
