what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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