This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
