For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
