Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
