Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
