Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
