Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
i think im in europe. pls send help
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