Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
