Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize