where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
