Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
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