we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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