it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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