I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
just tell him i said nine months
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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