i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Randomize
