Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
