I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
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