Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Randomize
