eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
