I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
You pole danced in your parka.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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