You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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