she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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