i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
