Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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