on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
