My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
