East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
