i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
