Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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