What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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