whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
