So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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