You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
