fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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