she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Randomize
