dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
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