Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
