I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
