And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
