I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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