She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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