its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
