She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
