I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
how can u be prego again
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
