I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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