i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize