Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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